Falling out of love with your blog

This is the part of blogging that I knew was coming. It was unavoidable, like that first cold I get every spring when the seasons change. Its the phase where you look at all the work you've done, all the posts you've written, the various design iterations and the ten different headers you've created and you still don't know why you're doing it. It took me days to find the perfect bubbly water graphic for my header and an hour to figure out what color to make my Twitter feed font. I lovingly picked the perfect combination of tropical blues and revised my bio a gazillion times. You know, the one that lies about how effortless my overachieving achievements have been.

Now I hate it all. I have fallen out of love with the narrow columns and pink borders. And bubbles?! What was I thinking?! No one will read this crap and I should just delete the whole thing. As soon as they see I used the tiny LinkedIn icon (instead of the big one) and quote Marianne Williamson, they'll be gone. Then this little voice inside me says "please wait". "You love this blog" whispers the tiny voice in my head. (BTW, my tiny voice sounds just like Dakota Fanning). She calms me down and reminds me I'm probably just having a bad day. OK, I'm listening.

Turns out, the real reason I hate my blog is because I've been AWOL for several months and the stupid thing got ignored. Part of why I loved it back then was because we had a relationship. I nurtured it and it rewarded me with a sense of expression and creativity. What did I expect? That it would keep churning out readers and comments while I stepped away and played with my other friends? It doesn't work like that. I am the CEO, Mom and best friend to my blog and I'm happy to be back. I promise not to go away for too long. I wouldn't want that. Have you heard Dakota Fanning scream?