Sunday, February 20, 2011

The Big Exhale


This weekend, Dave and I hid out in a little cabin in Estes Park, a small mountain town about an hour away from Boulder. We didn't want a long drive but still wanted to feel like we had gone away. Too far away to worry about the laundry, chores, errands, and the dried-out Christmas tree still hidden in the back yard waiting to be taken to the wood chop place. On trips like these, I can measure my progress into emptiness with periodic and spontaneously audible sighs. Big exhales that sink me deeper into the realization that there simply isn't anything to do but breath.


As usual, it took about half a day to really settle into the bliss of nothingness. One of the first things I do in the morning is make a list. Every imaginable task required to achieve the 237 goals I set for myself that day. Lists are my friend. It was entertaining to witness myself struggling to make a mental list of "shoulds" on a trip where having no agenda was the goal. No list necessary? Exhale.


Even though the cabin had a full kitchen, I didn't want to cook at all. So before leaving, I stopped at Whole Foods and stocked up on all kinds of yummy prepared food. Grilled salmon, green beans almondine, candied yams, lobster chowder, fancy olives, three different kinds of cheeses, mangoes, pears and an insanely decadent chocolate cream pie. No cooking required? Exhale.

We hiked for three hours up Old Man Mountain randomly going off and on the trail as something of interest would catch our eye. It felt great to just stop and listen to the birds and the wind in the trees. No phone or Google reminders? Exhale.

I knew I had achieved escape velocity when I spent an hour watching the melting snow drip slowly from the roof into tiny puddles on the deck. Exhale.


For a weekend, no one needed me. No meetings, conference calls, or deadlines. No shuttling kids to hockey, baseball, band practice, or a friend's house. No parent-teacher conferences, permission slips, lunch money, or forgotten homework. I love the busy-ness that makes up my life. I created it and wouldn't have it any other way. But once in a while, it feels good to be still. To be quiet. To experience divine invisibility. Exhale.

10 comments:

Unknown said...

Gotta love Estes. I went to Cheley Camps there as a kid. Thanks for bring back a wonderful memory this morning. Great looking cabin.

Mediamum said...

What fantastic pictures. You made me want to slow my breathing down just reading along with you. Well worth it, even for a moment. Thanks!

Lynn MacDonald said...

Wow...that sounds fantastic! it looks like you had a great time too! I hate lists...they're my mortal enemy which is why i totally ignore them...unless threatened with dire circumstances. Then i lose it...just easier that way i guess

Heather of the EO said...

Good for you, lady. It looks and sounds so beautiful! I'm so glad you had that time. :)

Carol Lawrence And Stacy Toten said...

Sound like my kind of weekend. Beautiful pictures. Colorado looks a lot like Montana. I'm glad you got to get away.

Grandmabeckyl.blogspot said...

What a get away! Glad you could do it. Loved the photos. Thanks for sharing and remembering that we have to find time to exhale. Sometimes it means to shut off technology and read a book or knit. That's what I do. It's hard! Have a great weekend!

Nena said...

What beautiful pictures! I love Colorado!!! So happy for you that you were able to relax and exhale, if only for a weekend.

Willpower said...

oh this made me miss my childhood playing grounds. Meeker Colorado the white river and the south fork canyon. Thanks for soem really great photo peeks.

Formal Shirts said...

Enjoyed reading post on your blog.!

Anonymous said...

Hmm is anyone else havkng problems with the pictures on thjis blog loading?
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